...and no one laid hands on Him, for His hour had not yet come. —John 8:20b
The last two nights have been rough. Fear rises up in Lydia before bed because she is so afraid that sleep will bring her closer to another seizure. All of her seizures have occurred in the morning, and the last two have woken her out of sleep (she had another over the weekend).
I don't blame her for feeling that fear. It rises up in me, too, especially when I awake in the early morning hours. Will it happen again? It's like living next to a ticking time bomb I didn't set. It might go off any minute, or it might not. But it's there ticking, reminding me of the scary sights and sounds that come from a small little girl not in control of her body.
But the other night during our family devotions, God reminded me of a simple truth. We have been taking the kids through the book of John, and AB has noted that three times now the same words have been repeated...
"and no one laid hands on Him, for His hour had not yet come."
Jesus has been saying some not so popular things around the teachers of the Law, and they clearly don't like this. Actually, they'd like to seize Him and kill Him. But they haven't, not because they couldn't find Him or reach Him, but because God wouldn't let them!. God's power is supreme, isn't it?
And it wasn't even that they would never be able to lay their hands on Him. No, just "His hour had not YET come". God prevented their action. He was in control. They had intent but no power to touch Him—until His hour came.
They laid their hands on Him and nailed Him to the Cross. Had God lost control for a moment? Of course not. He was accomplishing that greatest of all purposes—reconciling God and man. All of history up until that moment had awaited that hour, and all of history since has looked back upon it.
And so, as AB pointed out this phrase for the third time, the Holy Spirit illuminated it to me. Lydia's brain seems to be susceptible to abnormal electrical activity. Any time she could have another seizure. It seems more and more likely that it will happen, and sooner than the last one.
But it will not happen until the proper time has come. And when and if that time is, it will be for God's purposes, which we know are always good. We saw that with Luke, so how can I not trust the same now?
It brings me rest—I don't have to wonder if I've done enough to stop another seizure. I can walk confidently in the truth that God gives wisdom to those who ask, liberally without finding any fault (James 1). As we ask Him to show us what might be the root causes of her recent seizures and how to make wise decisions for her care, we can trust Him to help us to help her. And if another seizure occurs as we are in the process of finding these things out, He'll be there to walk through it with us and give us whatever we need.
And as for the future, it's okay, whatever may happen, because our Lord loves us and cares for us. He has good plans for us, both here on earth and there with Himself for all eternity. As I posted last time, our lives really are just one continuum of being seated in the heavenlies with Christ—it begins when we are saved in this life and (as we usually think of it) continues at death for all eternity. When my life is over, and He takes me home, I CAN'T leave His side. But this side of heaven, I must diligently keep myself from running off on my own and firmly root myself in that seat next to Him. Only from there can I watch His purposeful "hours" come and go, confidently resting in Him.
Please pray for Lydia, that we'd have some good answers and strategies for becoming seizure-free. May the Great Physician lay His hands on her and heal her, and remove all her fears.
Seated next to Him,